Good morning and Happy Happy Friday!!
Congratulations - you made it through another week! Only 8 more hours of your daily grind until it's time to P-A-R-T-Y!! Or rest up and watch the kids. I don't know what you do with your free time. But I do know that Christmas is 1 week away so if you haven't yet, it would probably be a good time to start Christmas Shopping...or hit up the Amazon.com. That place is the bomb for Holiday needs and you don't have to sit through this awful Atlanta Traffic. Aside from that, nothing else going on except...STAR WARS! Not sure if I let on that I'm excited about that yet, but I'm going to be having a Huge Nerdgasm at 7 o'clock sharp tonight. Sorry Nicole.
I've been running these a bit longer over the last couple weeks, so I'll try my best to keep this one short and sweet. That, and I'm getting a bit of the ol Carpal Tunnel, just finished up my Fantasy Re-Cap which can be read below this post. So if you got the patience, a little bit of time and a fresh cup of coffee then read away my friends! Thanks again for your time and support and I hope you enjoy!
Congratulations - you made it through another week! Only 8 more hours of your daily grind until it's time to P-A-R-T-Y!! Or rest up and watch the kids. I don't know what you do with your free time. But I do know that Christmas is 1 week away so if you haven't yet, it would probably be a good time to start Christmas Shopping...or hit up the Amazon.com. That place is the bomb for Holiday needs and you don't have to sit through this awful Atlanta Traffic. Aside from that, nothing else going on except...STAR WARS! Not sure if I let on that I'm excited about that yet, but I'm going to be having a Huge Nerdgasm at 7 o'clock sharp tonight. Sorry Nicole.
I've been running these a bit longer over the last couple weeks, so I'll try my best to keep this one short and sweet. That, and I'm getting a bit of the ol Carpal Tunnel, just finished up my Fantasy Re-Cap which can be read below this post. So if you got the patience, a little bit of time and a fresh cup of coffee then read away my friends! Thanks again for your time and support and I hope you enjoy!
SPORTS
NFL -
Starting off where we always do, let's jump right into the good stuff - Football. A lot of good games to cover. Especially for me & CJ's Jags. Last week the Hometown Heroes faced off in a Division rivalry game against the reigning AFC South Champs the Indianapolis Colts, under the leadership of AARP member Matt Hasselbeck. Despite having no Luck, The Colts have still been winning big games recently - while the Jaguars are coming of a 2 game losing streak with any hopes of somehow sneaking into the playoffs resting solely on this game. The first half was nothing impressive with Jags trailing 9-13...but in the 2nd 1/2 Blake Bortles EXPLODED, leading the Jags to score 42 unanswered points!!!! Jags won in Epic Fashion, defeating those Ponies 51-16!! The single largest margin of victory and highest score in Jaguars History!
Fun Fact #1: Jacksonville's victory Sunday ended the Colts' 16-game winning streak in the AFC South - the longest division streak in NFL history.
Fun Fact #2: Blake Bortles currently has 30 TDs this season. He is just the 3rd QB in NFL history with 30+ passing TDs through 13 games in a season in their 1st or 2nd year. the other 2 QBs? Dan Marino & Kurt Warner.
Fun Fact #3: No one has thrown more TDs since week 5 than Bortles. He's Actually Tied with Brady. He also ranks as the 3rd QB this year in Passing TDs. Brady is 1st with 33, and Palmer is 2nd with 31.
Last bit about the Jags - with that win, and the loss from the Titans and the Texans last weekend, the Jags are right back in the hunt for the Playoffs!! Now in order for that to happen we have to win out, the Colts have to lose to the Texans and then one other game, and Tennessee has to beat the Texans in Week 16. It's a long shot, but there's a chance!!!!
Fun Fact #2: Blake Bortles currently has 30 TDs this season. He is just the 3rd QB in NFL history with 30+ passing TDs through 13 games in a season in their 1st or 2nd year. the other 2 QBs? Dan Marino & Kurt Warner.
Fun Fact #3: No one has thrown more TDs since week 5 than Bortles. He's Actually Tied with Brady. He also ranks as the 3rd QB this year in Passing TDs. Brady is 1st with 33, and Palmer is 2nd with 31.
Last bit about the Jags - with that win, and the loss from the Titans and the Texans last weekend, the Jags are right back in the hunt for the Playoffs!! Now in order for that to happen we have to win out, the Colts have to lose to the Texans and then one other game, and Tennessee has to beat the Texans in Week 16. It's a long shot, but there's a chance!!!!
Moving on, the Falcons are getting worse, believe it or not. They were DEMOLISHED this weekend by Cam Newton and Co 38-0. Granted, they did play the Superbowl Bound, undefeated Carolina Panthers in Charlotte, NC - but still. These guys have given up. Their next challenge is a fired up Jacksonville team playing with a purpose. Would not be surprised if this is the nail in the coffin for their season and I don't see this ending well for Head Coach Dan Quinn.
Next up: The Eagles. Looks like there's life in those Birds yet. With a 4th Quarter Field Goal, Philly's Finest took out the Mrs Sins' beloved Buffalo Bills to move to 6-7 - tied in their division for 1st place and their playoff hopes very much alive. As much as I despise the Eagles, have to give them credit - they're pulling it off. However they have a tough schedule a head facing the Cardinals this week, the 2 must win Division games against the Redskins & the Giants in order to make it. But since I'm being delusional & optimistic about my guys, I can't hate on Dugan & Meide for being hopeful about their Eagles as well.
Elsewhere in the NFL, Brady & Gronk took care of business taking out the Texans to regain #1 seed in the AFC. Russell Wilson continued to take his sexual frustrations out on the field, destroying the Ravens 35-6. And ol' Discount Double-Check Aaron Rodgers is back to his old ways dismantling the Cowboys with ease. Oh and the Broncos? Looks like the thrill is gone. Brock may not be the chosen one after all. His two game winning streak was abruptly ended in embarrassing fashion against Derrick Carr & the Oakland Raiders. It's not that surprising though, considering that Raiders Head Coach Jack Del Rio designed the Broncos defense himself while working there for the past few years before taking the job in Oakland. It also doesn't help that Broncos star Wide Receiver can't hold onto the ball. He leads the league in dropped passes with 9 so far this season.
Lastly, the Steelers vs Bengals match up. Big Ben vs The Red Rifle. Ogbaratta vs Musser. A Grudge match for AFC North dominance. A whole lot of history here - as well as a whole lot of hate. This sign says it all:
Heading it this game Bengals were leading the division with a 10-2 record, and the Steelers were fighting for a Wild Card spot with a record of 7-5. Not a must win for the Bengals but a "like-to-win" scenario. But everything changed when Bengals QB Andy Dalton went down with a broken thumb on his throwing hand, and Alabama Alum AJ Mccarron stepped in to lead the Bengals straight into hell, losing 33-20. Dalton returned to the field later with a Black Cast over his forearm and hand, but he was not cleared to play. In fact, Dalton's status is now week-to-week with a small chance he could return to save the team. But with Andy out, the AFC North landscape has changed...Steelers win out, and Bengals lose the next 3 then the Steelers head to the playoffs and the Bengals hopes may be squashed again. Sorry Pete (Congrats Gina!)
Fun Fact: An Alabama QB has not one a single game in the NFL since 1987. But apparently McCarron doesn't think that applies to him, seeing how after his loss to the Steelers last Sunday he compared himself to Tom Brady when he was thrust into the limelight with a Drew Bledsoe injury and Brady led the Patriots to win the Super Bowl in 2001. Yea, somebody check that guy for a concussion, he's not thinking straight.
Before I move on, here's the rest of the losers that can't catch this year:
Before I move on, here's the rest of the losers that can't catch this year:
BASEBALL -
While normally I don't cover this "sport", something happened this week (or didn't happen I should say) that is worth mentioning. Pete Rose is still banned from Major League Baseball. Yup, big news/non-news. Rose, who was banned from baseball in 1989 after the league's investigation into his gambling, applied for reinstatement for a second time in February (the 1st time being in 1997). MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred announced Monday that he had rejected Rose's plea for reinstatement, citing that Rose is STILL gambling and more evidence surfacing that he bet on games when he was playing for the Cincinnati Reds. Based on talent alone, Rose would be Hall of Fame bound, finishing his career with 4,256 hits. However since he is a degenerate gambler that bet on the very sort he was playing and possibly games he was playing in/managing, he is banned from Baseball for life and cannot be in the Hall of Fame unless the ban is lifted. I bet he doesn't get back in...
While normally I don't cover this "sport", something happened this week (or didn't happen I should say) that is worth mentioning. Pete Rose is still banned from Major League Baseball. Yup, big news/non-news. Rose, who was banned from baseball in 1989 after the league's investigation into his gambling, applied for reinstatement for a second time in February (the 1st time being in 1997). MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred announced Monday that he had rejected Rose's plea for reinstatement, citing that Rose is STILL gambling and more evidence surfacing that he bet on games when he was playing for the Cincinnati Reds. Based on talent alone, Rose would be Hall of Fame bound, finishing his career with 4,256 hits. However since he is a degenerate gambler that bet on the very sort he was playing and possibly games he was playing in/managing, he is banned from Baseball for life and cannot be in the Hall of Fame unless the ban is lifted. I bet he doesn't get back in...
THE DONALD
You're probably thinking right about now - The Donald? as in Trump? What does he have to do with Sports? Not much, except that someone decided to Make the NFL Great Again and re-design every NFL Logo with the likeness of the Great Orange One. Check out the link earlier, they're pretty funny. Credit goes to Tace of Base for the heads up on this. My Favorite two:
The Eagles
and Da Bears
NERD NEWS
STAR WARS
As previously mentioned, today is a big day for Nerds and Virgins everywhere - the New Star Wars comes out. And it's kinda a Big Deal. How Big? Prior to the first actual screenings which began Thursday at Midnight, Star Wars: The Force Awakens shattered fandango record sales, breaking the All-Time Ticketing Record before even being seen once. Basically the ADVANCE Ticket sales out-sold movie ticket sales for films that had their entire run in theaters already.
STAR WARS
As previously mentioned, today is a big day for Nerds and Virgins everywhere - the New Star Wars comes out. And it's kinda a Big Deal. How Big? Prior to the first actual screenings which began Thursday at Midnight, Star Wars: The Force Awakens shattered fandango record sales, breaking the All-Time Ticketing Record before even being seen once. Basically the ADVANCE Ticket sales out-sold movie ticket sales for films that had their entire run in theaters already.
With all this hype and hoopla, of course there's those out there to ruin it for everyone. Angry Star Wars Extremists are threatening to spoil the movie for everyone by releasing the plot, twists and ending online after seeing the film unless their demands are met. They are calling themselves "The Alliance to Preserve the Expanded Universe" Their Demands? Besides the touch of a real woman? They want all their stories back. Basically when Disney bought Star Wars, Disney did away with any un-authorized "cannon" or as they call it the Expanded Universe - and they made some might mad nerds in the process. They're so mad at Disney and Star Wars, that they all bought tickets for Midnight so they could be the first to see it and then unleash their “spoil-jihadi” on the new movie, ruining it for other fans unless Disney agrees to continue the old EU (now dubbed Star Wars Legends) with new content. Kinda makes sense they'd revert to terrorist threats considering what the original Star Wars is basically about:
GAINESVILLE SMELLS LIKE PISS
According to recent reports, UF will now stand for Urine Football if Environmental Engineering Professor Treavor Boyer has his way. Boyer is proposing that The Swamp in Gainesville and all of the people attending the football games be part of a massive science experiment in sustainability. Basically he wants fertilize their field with urine. His idea is to stop streaming urine to a wastewater facility and collect the pee in giant vats at the stadium instead to then use to fertilize the field. “We know a can should get recycled. I don’t think most people feel that way about urine, right? Most people don’t urinate and be like ‘That should have been recycled and recovered,'” he said. “My sort of vision of maybe a slightly skewed world that’s what I want people to think about every time they urinate, like wow, those are nutrients that could have been saved and reused,” he added. Gross. Go Gata?
CATS WILL KILL YOU - Especially at Christmas!!
Christmas is a time for giving, a time to reflect on the many blessings you have and spend your days with the ones you love. Unless you're in Iceland. There Christmas is a time for working hard, and getting new clothes so the scary as Yule Cat won't eat you. This Icelandic Christmas Myth was apparently devised as a way of enhancing productivity among the working class. According to the National Museum of Iceland, “It is likely that the Yule Cat myth was originally designed to urge farm workers to perform well prior to Christmas… Those who did not… [ended] up in the Yule Cat.". So workers who were deemed productive were given new clothing and thereby made safe from the Yule Cat. Those who were considered to be lazy however, were left without new clothes, and made vulnerable to the feral feline with a taste for human flesh. Basically like Garfield meets The Walking Dead. Merry Christmas?
Christmas is a time for giving, a time to reflect on the many blessings you have and spend your days with the ones you love. Unless you're in Iceland. There Christmas is a time for working hard, and getting new clothes so the scary as Yule Cat won't eat you. This Icelandic Christmas Myth was apparently devised as a way of enhancing productivity among the working class. According to the National Museum of Iceland, “It is likely that the Yule Cat myth was originally designed to urge farm workers to perform well prior to Christmas… Those who did not… [ended] up in the Yule Cat.". So workers who were deemed productive were given new clothing and thereby made safe from the Yule Cat. Those who were considered to be lazy however, were left without new clothes, and made vulnerable to the feral feline with a taste for human flesh. Basically like Garfield meets The Walking Dead. Merry Christmas?
FARTING MAKES THE HEART GROW FONDER
Love Stinks Ladies. It's true. Well according to Cosmo it is. Yes the Women's magazine, claims that the Key to a great relationship (for Women) is Farting in front of your Boyfriend/lover. The article goes on to say that by lowering your guard and letting those Love Toots Loose, women can be themselves around their partner - Despite the fact that your place will now smell like the bathroom of a low-budget Mexican restaurant. Although it sounds crazy, there's alot of truth to it. Me and the misses let that guard down pretty early on (back when we were just roomates) and ever since I don't mind suffocating her with my Dead Liver Stinkers. She may regret it, but I sure don't. And look at us - hap hap happy as hell!!! We use a TON of Febreeze, but Happy none-the-less!!
Love Stinks Ladies. It's true. Well according to Cosmo it is. Yes the Women's magazine, claims that the Key to a great relationship (for Women) is Farting in front of your Boyfriend/lover. The article goes on to say that by lowering your guard and letting those Love Toots Loose, women can be themselves around their partner - Despite the fact that your place will now smell like the bathroom of a low-budget Mexican restaurant. Although it sounds crazy, there's alot of truth to it. Me and the misses let that guard down pretty early on (back when we were just roomates) and ever since I don't mind suffocating her with my Dead Liver Stinkers. She may regret it, but I sure don't. And look at us - hap hap happy as hell!!! We use a TON of Febreeze, but Happy none-the-less!!
MEME of The WEEK
Going to take a break from the norm this week and go off script. There was no stand-out Shame of the Week - but some good news on 2 fronts that needed to be shared so instead there will be 2 separate "Fame of the Week"s.
FAME of The WEEK #1
The Mussers
Turns out when he's not busy running over precious packages in his driving and cooking up some sweet meats with his man-friend Oggi, the Muss-buss has been,well busy gettin' busy. Yes, it turns out Mrs Musser was not satisfied with having one ridiculously good-looking baby so she decided to go ahead and make another! It has been Baby-Making time up here in Atlanta, and I'm excited to see our numbers grow! When the Apocolpyse comes, we're going to have quite the army on our hands. Congrats are definitely in order for the First Family of OTP - couldn't be happier for you all!!! Here's a quick peak into your Christmas future:
FAME of The WEEK #2
"El Toro" Dalrymple
All healed up from his Key West wounds, El Toro made his way back to work and realized that his job sucked. Seriously sucked. He's been doing a a few levels above his paygrade for months now with the promise of a promotion dangling out in front like a carrot on a stick. Although people were jumping ship left and right, he stuck it out and gave them the chance to make things right - but let them know they had til the years end to do so. With the writing on the wall that they were not going to show him the money and the year coming to a close, he made a move. Juggling interviews, negotiating terms and piting offers against each other, the Boy has become The MAN! El Toro officially accepted his new position with a company up in Alpharetta, landed a huge much deserved raise and reeled in a solid signing Bonus. He'll be starting the new year off on the right foot - at a job he fought for in a position he deserves. Hats off my man, damn proud of you!!
Well, that's about it. My best efforts failed and I still rambled on way too long - but thanks again for sticking around and I hope this helped to start your morning off right. Please comment or like below if you enjoyed - or leave a bit of feedback if you didn't. Either way is great with me.
If I don't see you before Christmas/Festivus/Kwanzaa/Hanukkah then be safe and be Merry. Have a great Holiday week, and as always - go Noles (And Jags!!)
Now Go Forth - Tackle the day, and May the Force Be With You!! (hehe)